From the Battlefield

Well this feels silly to start writing about my “journey” but this is the best and easiest way to mass update everyone on next steps and current plans. If you are just tuning in, in November I was diagnosed with Stage 3A Triple Negative Breast Cancer. As I am just 35, I do not have routine mammograms and no other preventative visits aside from my annual doctor appointments. Here is a brief timeline of events from November to current:

• November 8th – I found a lump during a self exam. The weekend prior I just completed a 10k and could not figure out why a week later my chest still hurt, I started my self exam and found the lump which felt like a grape under my skin in seconds. I called my gynocologist and they sent me for a mammogram and ultrasound.
• November 15th – I had my mammogram and ultrasound the doctor who read the results sat down, held my hand and said “it didn’t look good” I left that appointment with a biopsy scheduled as well as an appointment with a breast surgeon.
• November 19th – guided breast biopsy
• November 21st – I checked my portal at 4:30am and saw “invasive carcinoma” about 300 times
• November 25th – met my breast surgeon and my Oncologist. This is when everything starts moving really fast.
• December 2nd – Echo to check my heart before chemo and CT scan with contrast to confirm the cancer hadn’t spread any further than two spots in my breast and in one lymph node.
• December 3rd – treatment education with my Oncologist and my port placement.
• December 12th – 1st treatment Keytruda (immunotherapy to teach my body to attack cancer cells, Paclitaxel (chemo) and Carboplatin (chemo)
• December 19th – 2nd treatment Paclitaxel (chemo) and Carboplatin (chemo)
• December 26th – 3rd treatment Paclitaxel (chemo) and Carboplatin (chemo)and last day of cycle one
• January 2nd – DELAY my liver enzymes were way elevated and they didn’t want to damage my liver
• January 9th – 4th treatment Keytruda (immunotherapy to teach my body to attack cancer cells, Paclitaxel (chemo) and Carboplatin (chemo) and first day of cycle 2
• January 16th – 5th treatment Paclitaxel (chemo) and Carboplatin (chemo)
• January 23rd DELAY again with the liver…..
• January 30th – 6th treatment Paclitaxel (chemo) and Carboplatin (chemo)and last day of cycle two
• February 4th – I had my port checked because I was having chest pains but those tests came back as working as normal.
• February 6th – 7th treatment Keytruda (immunotherapy to teach my body to attack cancer cells, Paclitaxel (chemo) and Carboplatin (chemo) and first day of cycle 3
• February 13th – 8th treatment Paclitaxel (chemo) and Carboplatin (chemo)
• February 20th – 9th treatment Paclitaxel (chemo) and Carboplatin (chemo) and last day of cycle three

My next appointment will be on February 27th which hopefully is treatment 10 and cycle 3 day 1 assuming my liver continues to play nicely with others. I am also currently waiting on some bloodwork to determine if I have Gilberts (Gill-Bears because apparently he was French) disease which can affect the liver and only 1% of the population has. We love exclusivity.

March 25th I am having scans again to see if my tumors are responding to the treatment plan. We know that they are though because they can no longer be felt so everyone that has joined me in praying for complete pathological response, please don’t stop. When I am finished with cycle four, I will move to phase 2 of my treatment plan that will be 8 weeks long but I will go every other week. This treatment plan will introduce new medications Doxorubicin (red devil) and Cyclophosphamide (chemo) but I will still take the Keytruda (immunotheraphy). As of right now, my Oncologist said to plan on my double mastectomy for sometime in June as I am scheduled to finish chemo treatments beginning of May.

Cancer has taken so much from me. I feel violated, everyone and I mean everyone is a threat to me. I no longer feel safe, I seclude myself at home because it’s flu season but also getting sick isn’t worth it. I wash my kids up as soon as they come home from school. I take antidepressants and anxiety medication every single day. Xanax was my best friend November and December, if you saw me then I am sorry I was barely functioning as a human. Panic attacks are a normal now. Oh also I don’t have hair. However, cancer can never take away my friendships, my love for my family and my faith. It has strengthened my relationship with my husband and my kids. I wouldn’t say I am strong or brave. I have no choice, it’s either fight back with every fiber of my being or give up and I just don’t have that give up mentality. Before my first treatment I said I was going to battle and I am, I am in the fight of my life, for my life.

If I can encourage even one person to do monthly self exams then I am happy. Set an alarm to do your exams the first of the month, in the shower whenever just please do them. Please be proactive, advocate for yourself.